week two, thursday afternoon

[jettisons]

[Bellamy practically tears his way down to the beach from the oasis, heart in his throat. He's forcing himself to cling to the fact that it's too early for this, that Haru's body didn't disappear, that it doesn't make sense for this to be so different, but that doesn't wipe the image of Raven, throat slit, red bleeding into the rocks, out of his head.

It doesn't matter. He hasn't been this blind with panic since Roan took Clarke, since Octavia was locked out of the bunker. He's almost dizzy with it.]

Raven!

Comments

[hydrazine]

[She's not far behind. As soon as she realized what was happening, she took off looking for him, and she sucks in a breath once she hears his voice. There's a deep wave of relief, but it's not without a sharp edge of fear and panic to it. Her own voice rises as well as a result.]

Bellamy!

[She stops herself from asking if it's really him, but she hesitates slightly before bridging the gap between them regardless.]

[jettisons]

[The relief he feels at the sound of her voice is almost as overwhelming, enough to make his breath catch in his throat. He reaches for her automatically, half expecting to feel nothing at all when his fingers touch her arm. She's here, though—she's solid and real and warm, and before he can even consider it he's pulling her to him, wrapping his arms around her tightly. He can't quite get his heart to stop hammering.]

You're safe. I thought—

[His voice almost breaks and he cuts himself off, pulling in a sharp, shaky breath.]

[hydrazine]

[She tenses slightly as he pulls her closer, if only because of everything else that's been happening tonight... But she can feel his warmth, too, and she takes in a breath.]

...I know. But we're both safe.

[jettisons]

I saw you. By the oasis.

[It makes no sense without context, but Bellamy feels a bit like he's losing his mind, and that fact doesn't even register. Raven is the only thing making him feel steadier now, and after a second, he buries his face in her shoulder, as though that might convince him that she's real.]

[hydrazine]

I'm not by the oasis. I'm right here.

[She might not know the context, but it's obvious how distraught he seems. Her arms wrap around him, one hand moving up to hold the back of his neck in a gesture she hopes is comforting.

Even as she does that, her eyes slide closed, as if to block something troubling out.]

[jettisons]

[Bellamy stays quiet for a long moment, soaking in the touch as he struggles to get his breathing and his heart rate under control. She's fine. She's fine.]

So what the hell was that?

[He's still not letting go.]

[hydrazine]

...People are hallucinating. Everyone has been acting like they did when they ate those nuts at camp.

[She doesn't make any motion to get him to let go. She's fine with staying like this as long as he needs.]

[jettisons]

[He sighs, low and long. Like they need any more chaos.]

Have you seen anything?

[hydrazine]

[She hesitates, falters.]

First, tell me what you're seeing.

[jettisons]

[God, how is he supposed to tell her this? She's dealing with enough, especially if she's got her own hallucinations to contend with, but he can't bring himself to dodge the question or lie to her, either. His voice is quiet and more hesitant when he finally forces himself to reply.]

Clarke. Octavia.

[He doesn't need to go into detail there, does he?]

I saw you by the oasis. I thought you were dead.

[hydrazine]

[A weak attempt at humor is almost on her lips: I'm too awesome to die two weeks in. The detail about Clarke stops that before it forms, though. She takes a deep breath in, and one long exhale, before she carefully reaches for his hand.]

We're both okay.

[By some definition of the week, at least. Physically, to be sure.]

[jettisons]

I know.

[He pulls back finally, but he doesn't go far. He tangles his fingers with hers and squeezes tight.]

What did you see?

[hydrazine]

[She hesitates again; she seems to be weighing something in her head. It takes her a few moments, but she seems to make up her mind. She won't lie to him now, not with the way he seems so vulnerable. Not with the way he had clung to her just a moment ago.

After all... Always.]

Nothing.

[jettisons]

[He frowns. Clearly, he isn't buying it.]

Raven.

[hydrazine]

[She shakes her head, takes in a breath.]

I'm not lying. I'm... Dammit.

[She glances up like she's trying to collect herself for a moment, before she makes eye contact with him.]

I wouldn't lie to you right now.

[jettisons]

[He squeezes her hand again, gentler this time. Honestly, he hopes she isn't hallucinating. She's had enough of that for a lifetime.]

So what's going on?

[hydrazine]

[She frowns, purses her lips.]

You aren't going to like that answer.

[jettisons]

It doesn't matter, Raven. Tell me.

[hydrazine]

I think I'm immune for a reason.

[She looks down to the ground.]

...He told everyone there was a role responsible for making sure someone dies each week, no matter what. Remember?

[jettisons]

[The correct thing to do here would be to respond immediately, to say something calming or comforting or both, but Bellamy can't. He just stares at her for a long moment.]

I remember. And that's you? Did you know from the beginning?

[hydrazine]

[She takes her own pause, shaking her head.]

Not from the beginning.

[Something about her tone suggests she didn't just find out, though.]

[jettisons]

How long?

[hydrazine]

...The Monday after we all got here.

[Almost unconsciously, she crosses her arms.]

[jettisons]

Why didn't you tell me?

[hydrazine]

I wanted to make sure with that nothing would happen to either of us if I told you. It took time to get that answer out of them.

[She sighs.]