el nysa inbox

[jettisons]

I'll make this look pretty later!

Comments

[tailorable]

[ oooh, mr blake, oooh. Eggsy immediately leans into the touch, very willing to take the assistance without so much as a "thank you" :') ]

I'm smashing. [ more like smashed. ] Just had a shite day. [ weeeeeeell. ] Shite week? Shite month.

stop using shirtless icons on me it's rude

[jettisons]

[Bellamy will gently, but firmly, steer Eggsy towards the exit. He has a feeling they've overstayed their welcome.]

Do you want to be more specific?

that sounds like a personal problem

[tailorable]

[ Eggsy does his best to follow Bellamy's lead. The question makes him snort. ]

You don't want me to be more specific. [ a truly bullshit non-answer. quickly — ] Can I stay with you? Harry [ he says, not Henry. ] won't be — he'll be fucking disappointed.

[ ugh ugh ugh. ]

IT'S A YOU BULLYING ME PROBLEM!!!

[jettisons]

Yeah, you can stay.

[He says it immediately, like it's no big deal, because it really isn't. Clarke certainly won't judge.]

Harry?

fine i'll use my least sexy icon (*other than the poop icons)

[tailorable]

[ stop being!! such a perfect friend!! bellamy blake!! and making his chest tighten with how easily the instinctive kindness moves him. ]

Oh, shut up. [ 'course he's having a proper whinging session now. ] I know it's stupid. I just get all nervy about fucking it up with him — [ listen, he's not on top form to the point where he doesn't register how odd it is to hear someone else say harry's name for a long moment. ] — up with Henry. I meant Henry. [ oh god. ] Jesus, I'm wankered.

[ which is true, at least. ]

what are the poop icons...

[jettisons]

[It's not everyone Bellamy would get out of bed at 3 am for, but Eggsy is firmly in that circle. Unfortunately for Eggsy, that also means he isn't going to drop this subject.]

Fucking what up, exactly?

[That's still certainly not what got Eggsy out here in the first place.]

these sewer ones from k2...

[tailorable]

Just [ another pause. ] everything. Fucked it all up the first time.

[ and this is his second chance — with Harry miraculously alive and yet still likely disappear, same as Roxy. And Margaery, and Jeanie, and Athena. ]

Can't afford to fuck it up again, yeah? With people coming and going like it's... like it's nothing.

[ he's sort of all over the place, but finally circling back to the present topic, in a way. ]

HORRENDOUS

[jettisons]

[Ah, there it is. Bellamy gives Eggsy's shoulder a squeeze.]

Who left?

[Went back to stasis. It's the same thing, isn't it?]

YOU ASKED FOR THIS

[tailorable]

[ It takes him a moment to answer. ]

My best mate. From home. [ saying her name seems difficult right now. He goes on, anyway. ] Roxy. [ a beat. ] And this girl. A proper lady. From some rubbish place. And I didn't even fucking kiss her. [ wah wah. ]

[ He scrubs at his face with his free hand. ]

i did i regret it

[jettisons]

[Oh, Eggsy.]

Clarke went back into stasis, remember? But she came back, good as new.

g o o d

[tailorable]

[ Clarke came back, which is... something. ]

Athena and Jeanie and Kara haven't come back, have they? It's random, is what it is.

smh!!!!

[jettisons]

[He doesn't know who Athena and Jeanie are, but Kara... He definitely misses Kara.]

Maybe it is. Who knows what the hell they're thinking.

[The Natha, he means.]

I'm sorry, Eggsy.

[tailorable]

[ He leans into Bellamy and sighs. ]

Just don't fucking leave me, too, or I'll get a bloody ASBO without you.

[jettisons]

[He snorts, leading Eggsy down a side street. Almost there.]

A what?

[tailorable]

[ drawling. ] A, S, B, O. An anti-social behaviour order.

[ still sad, still bitter, but perhaps a little distracted by the question. ]

You get it for public drunkenness, trespassing, knicking cars, starting fights — y'know, my everyday routine.

[jettisons]

Yeah? Since when is that your everyday routine?

[tailorable]

[ wow, he's a bad boy! he's cool! he's wild! ]

S'not. Not anymore.

[jettisons]

I'm not proud of everything I've done, either.

[...Most things he's done, actually.]

All I've seen you do around here is help people. What makes you think you're going to slide back into who you used to be?

[tailorable]

[ that is straight to the heart of an issue that he wasn't fully aware he had. maybe that's why he's so hung up on harry — on the idea of harry disappearing. 'cause he credits harry with everything he's become. bellamy's words make his stomach twist, not altogether unpleasantly, but it's not the sort of reassurance he hears often. ]

Yeah? [ eggsy can't imagine bellamy being like him, not with how he is now. i'm not proud, he says. eggsy files that away to ask after later. ] I dunno. [ He swallows. ] Guess that's just what I always do.

[ He backslides. ]

[jettisons]

[He scoffs, untangling himself from Eggsy once they reach the apartment so he can pull his keys out of his jacket pocket.]

But that's not who you want to be, so what's got you so freaked out? You think it's out of your control?

[tailorable]

[ Ooooh, wow, standing without Bellamy is not as easy as it should be. Eggsy abruptly shifts to lean against the outer wall of the apartment. Better.

Briefly, he thinks about James coddling him after the ball, Thomas giving in to his pestering, Dutch pushing him through the door of his flat, Monty telling him exactly how one distracts themselves from being sad — getting utterly foxed with someone awfully pretty, wasn't it?

Why the actual fuck did he ring the one person who would make him deal with his problems again? (besides Harry, of course, but that was never an option). ]

Mate, I can barely stand. [ which is a bullshit answer, even if it's true. ] Control ain't the watchword. [ He moves to card a hand through his hair and knocks off his hat in the process. ] That's why I rang you instead of literally anyone else.

[jettisons]

[Bellamy opens the door and then leans down to scoop up the hat, offering it back to Eggsy. He's not... quite following.]

Why's that?

[tailorable]

Thanks. [ oh, now he says thanks. He doesn’t move to go through the door, just looking at Bellamy for a minute. Too long probably. ] Because you do — this. You don’t let me just do stupid shit.

Like when I told you about the Madam’s experiment — drug test, I mean. [ experiment still sounds worse. ] Everyone else just, like, coddles me. Or, y’know, they’re all — [ He winks, embarrassing as ever. ] — but there’s no bullshit with you.

[jettisons]

[Oh. That.]

Coddling's never fixed anything for me.

[And, since Eggsy still looks like he's about to keel over, Bellamy takes his arm again to lead him inside.]

[tailorable]

[ bless bellamy blake ]

‘Course not. You’re fuckin’ — [ searching for the phrase, searching, seaching... he puts all of his (not insignificant) weight on bellamy for a second before he realises what he’s doing. ] — tough as nails. Yeah.